Red Letter

Temporary Romance
A short story

While I was falling apart in my sadness, he was filling his stomach with grilled beef, chicken and beer and happily jamming with his friends. It's like after all it was nothing to you. After the break up, I realize the purpose of relationship. It will always about love at first and people play with emotions. Some relationships lasts long and you don't know when it will be over. Sometimes, after 1 year or after 5 years and maybe after 3 months. But then, you will also realized, if people don't trust love anymore and gave up it will be like I will be immune to be hurt and will not love anymore. A woman who will live with the pain just to get over and forget. Because even you cried a lot, he will never come back.

After my 5th relationship ended,  I never gave any passion to the people and acquaintances around me. I only seldom see my friends and choose to stay at home, hang out alone when bored at house or work out, play badminton with acquaintances. The people who confess their love for me or telling they like me, I ignore, telling straight to them that I don't want them or saying I don't know how to treat guys and I will only hurt you. 

...Sometimes, I want to use them to get rid  of the hurt and  being alone.

 

In respond, people think if you being mean to them they call it attitude or choosy when you just have that personality or your standard. Then if you are being simple and nice they will cheat you and stabbed you in the back, so when they know you need comfort and love, they will hurt you and play your emotions. Just shit.

Do you know what is the reason for break ups?
Fall out of love and the passion of dating is gone. People get bored with the same routine. It is sometimes right and sometimes not. But you can see it.. Dating is annoying. I never had a date which I have to wear pretty dress and be a lady one time, I never had a date that I feel comfortable just like getting to know each other than holding hands and kissing. I like being alone the best and I don't like being bothered. I don't want to cross fates with anyone, anymore. Sometimes all i feel was these.. Whenever my heart hurts and sad, I don't get angry and yell at the world. I just chose to be alone, listen to piano songs and cry. And that's how love changed me.

You cannot blame a woman who didn't ask for any reasons why everything's happened or why did you choose to leave them. Just that way, because, we are too hurt. Why she didn't fight her love for you? What do you expect from her if you already left? She did everything for both of you and you just choose to give up.

....Just let it go....

I will never beg for the love anymore, I will never look for it. When people really wants to be with me and wants to enter my life, then they have to make an effort and not as shit to tell you that they love you. Question is: "Until when?"

Yeon

A Princess' Tears

-Short Story-
(A sudden break up)

Rachel: Where have you been? Didn't you know I keep looking for you, I'm worried that something happened already to u that's why you're missing for a few days. Are you sick ? Why not message me :(

Kristoff: I'm very busy and  I don't feel to online and  message you.

Rachel: Why?

Kristoff: You're always getting mad and I don't know why and it makes me unhappy.

Rachel: You don't love me anymore? Are u giving up?

Kristoff: Yes I give up.

Rachel: Why like that? Why so soon? You said you love me. Now not anymore?

Kristoff: We can be friends if you want.

Rachel: You know I'm not mad, if I get mad, there will be a reason. And I already told you  if I get mad, it's just sulking. I can't mad to you. You know  I don't get mad to you for long. I even waiting your reply but there's nothing. :( You said you love me and  you accept me even I'm like this. And now you don't like it anymore? I don't always mad at you. You should know that. You made me fall in love with you and now you're going to leave me?

Kristoff: I'm sorry :(

Rachel: Can't you think about it? Let's fix this.

Kristoff: I also don't want  someday I will be tied  up.

Rachel: You know you are free, I never kept you from doing anything you want. You see me like that? Ok then..

Kristoff: Let's take a break first.

Rachel: Do you still like me?

Kristoff: Yes

Rachel: Alright, if that's what you want.. I can't force you.. I will wait for you and sorry for what I said before, I never mean it. :(

Kristoff: Yeah, we take a break first ok and rest..

Rachel sent a message after 2 hours

"I'm really sorry if my attitude to you makes you unhappy.. I never mean anything bad i said if you think I'm mad. I cant think right that time. I don't know now what will happen but I will wait for you.. i really love you and sorry."

He replied: "I know you don't mean bad just take care and rest well.. Goodnight, sweet dreams and  sleep tight."

........The next day........

Rachel was busy at work, she never think anything but she is only silent and not talking to other people. Then she got a call from Kristoff.

Kristoff: How are you?

Rachel: I'm fine

Kristoff: I heard you are leaving here. Why are you quitting? Is it because of me?

Rachel: I don't know.

Kristoff: Don't quit please.

Rachel: (in mind) are you always been like this? You're asking too much. First u gave up to me, second, you ask to be friends and now you want me stay with you? Did you ever consider what would I feel?

Kristoff: I will rest soon , I'm still sick, I'm 2 days sick.

Rachel: You should've taken care yourself.

Kristoff: I'll try. But I'm more worried for you.

Rachel: Why?

Kristoff: Because you're someone I loved before

Rachel:(in mind) before? So not anymore?

Kristoff: By the way, I am happy that I still see you here and talking to me.

Rachel: I will go out.

Kristoff: OK. I will go home, I'll see you later ok?

.....no reply...

Kristoff: what are you doing not sleeping?

Rachel: I'm busy doing installing my PC drivers

Kristoff: you got many car ah so long? (Laughs)

Rachel:(in mind) you still can joke ah. Lol

Kristoff: Ok I will see you tomorrow ok? I go off now. You should rest soon. You can message me anytime you want but I'll read it  If I got home already ok?

Rachel: Ok. Ty.

Then, Rachel sent a personal mail after an hour.

"I want to talk to you. But i don't want.. I wish you are fine.. but you know, i was keeping myself busy so i dont remember anything, but at the end of the day, i worry about u and i missed you. And it hurts, i didnt know that this will happen that the person i thought who love me will leave me all of a sudden. These past few days i didn't think about what happened. Yes , it hurts. And I cant even shout it because i don't know. And you take care yourself , you're not a baby anymore. Goodnight.."

 

 To be continued..

"Sometimes I wonder, if there's at least one reason to hold on, I will."

Yeon