Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Bunga Biru (BLue Flower)



http://www.thefloralfixx.ca/Blog/images/forget-me-nots1-1.jpg

Bunga Biru Story

--Hati yang terkunci

Aku percaya bahwa ada pasangan untuk setiap orang

Ada sesaat, aku melihat dan membayangkan, apakah kau pernah duduk disana memikirkanku?? Kau akan terkejut apabila kau tahu betapa ku memikirkanmu

Aku bangun setiap pagi dari tidurku memikirkanmu, saat kudengarkan musik aku memikirkanmu. Dan disaat aku bekerja aku sangat berharap dapat bertemu denganmu..kuberbaring dan memikirkanmu. Andaikan kau sadar apa yang telah kau perbuat padaku, aku berpikir ini saatnya untuk berjalan maju dan tidak melihat ke belakang. Aku tak akan menyangkal bahwa ini sangat menyakitkan. Sebenarnya aku berpikir bahwa dirimulah yang kuinginkan untuk dapat bersamaku, dan kau sangat memiliki potensi untuk menjadi lebih dari dirimu sekarang. Ya, kau membuatku sakit hati, tetapi aku tidak apa-apa. Kita bisa saja menjadi sangat baik dan kau tak akan pernah mengharapkan sebanyak apa yang dapat kuberikan padamu.

Kau tak pernah memberikan ku kesempatan walaupun kau berkata kau akan memberikannya, dan itu berarti kau tidak pernah tau apa yang akan terjadi. Kau berkata bahwa kau akan membuatku jatuh cinta padamu seperti kau mencintaiku. Aku tidak tau dimana posisi dirikudihatimu dan aku tidak tahu apa arti diriku untukmu. Aku tahu semua yang kau pikirkan tentang diriku hanyalah seperti teman biasa , dan melewati batas ini adalah hal terakhir yang kau inginkan. Tetapi aku harus mengatakannya.. aku tak dapat melihat kedalam matamu tanpa menginginkan untuk menciummu, dan aku tak dapat berbicara padamu tanpa memberitahukanmu apa perasaanku.

Aku tahu mungkin hal ini akan membuat hubungan kita hancur, tetapi aku bersedia mengambil kesempatan ini. Aku tak pernah merasakan perasaan seperti ini sebelumnya kepada siapapun. Dan dengan menuliskan surat panjang ini aku takut kau akan menjauh dari ku dan kurasa ini sangat menyakitkan buatku. Aku tidak dapat membiarkan satu hari lagi berlalu tanpa memberitahukan hal ini padamu, tak perduli apapun yang akan terjadi. Aku tahu ada sesaat dalam dirimu merasa ragu. Dan apabila ada sesaat keraguan, itu berarti kau merasakan sesuatu juga. Aku rasa kau tidak tahu dimana posisimu dihatiku, dan hatiku hancur berkeping-keping hanya dengan memikirkan apa arti diriku untuk mu.

Kau adalah seseorang yang spesial bagiku, siapapun yang nantinya akan ku coba untuk kucintai, aku tetap cinta padamu

Terkadang aku berpikir apakah kita dapat hidup bersama. Hanya Tuhan yang tahu betapa aku merindukanmu, betapa aku mencintaimu.

Karena didalam mataku hanya kaulah satu-satunya. Tak ada satupun laki-laki lain yang dapat menggantikan posisimu di hatiku. Dan apabila aku bersama yang lain, itu tidak sama! Karena yang kupikirkan hanyalah tentang diriku dan dirimu, tentang apa yang telah terjadi diantara kita, dan apakah hal itu akan terjadi diantara kita.

Aku tidak dapat hidup tanpamu.. haruspun aku melihat bahwa aku dapat hidup, tetapi aku tidak bahagia. Mungkin suatu hari nanti kita akan berpikir bahwa kau adalah satu-satunya untukku dan begitu juga sebaliknya, dan kita dapat hidup bahagia selama-lamanya seperti kisah-kisah putri dalam dongeng. Namun itulah cerita yang kuinginkan untuk terjadi pada kita. Dan apabila kita pada akhirnya dapat bersama suatu hari nanti aku yakin kita akan lebih bahagia dari cerita-cerita itu.

Aku rasa aku sudah mengatakan yang ingin kukatakan, tetapi aku ingin kau tahu bahwa aku menyukaimu apa adanya. Dan aku ingin kau tau bahwa kau akan lebih bahagia bersamaku. Dan sebanyak yang kau katakan bahwa “dia tidak mengerti aku, dia tidak mencintaiku apa adanya, kita berbeda”, pikirkanlah sebanyak apa aku mengganggumu, menelponmu, dan hal-hal menyebalkan lainnya yang kuperbuat hanya untuk mendapatkan perhatianmu atau untuk dapat dekat denganku(HEHEHEH!). Kejadian itu, obrolan-obrolan itu tersimpan dalam hatiku. Ketika kau mencintai seseorang, perkataan-perkataannya akan sulit untuk dilupakan.. aku harap kau dapat mengerti semua itu.. dan satu hal lagi “ jangan mencoba untuk mengerti wanita, kau hanya akan gagal”


---- REQUESTED

~English Version

Blue Flower

--One heart is sealed.

I believe that there is someone for everyone.

One time, I just look and wonder, do you ever sit there and think about me?? You'd be surprised if you only knew how much I think of you..

I wake up every morning with you on my mind.. I listen to music and thinking of you.. and between I’m working I hope to see you..I lie in bed thinking about you. If you only knew what you do to me. So, I think it might be time for me to keep walking and not look back. I'm not going to deny that it hurts. I actually thought you were someone who I wanted to be with, and you had so much potential to be so much more than you are now. Yes, you did hurt me, but I'm okay. We would have been so great and you would never have wished for more than I could have given you. You never gave it a chance, even though you said you would, and that means you'll never know what could've been. You said I try to make you fall in love with me same as I love you. I don't know where I stand with you or what I mean to you. I know all you think of me is a friend and that crossing the line is the last you'd want to do, but I just had to say it. I can’t look into your eyes without wanting to kiss you, and I can’t talk to you without wanting to tell you how I feel.

I know this might ruin our connection, but I'm willing to take this chance. I've never felt this way before about anyone. If telling you this whole long message I’m afraid you will stay away from me then I guess this hurts me. I couldn't let another day go by without telling you, regardless what happens. I know some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there’s a moment of hesitation, that means you feel something too. I don’t think you know where you stand in my life and it tears my heart into pieces just thinking about where I stand in yours.

I feel your my special person, Whoever I try to love, I’m still in love with you. Sometimes I wonder if we'll ever be together. God only knows how much I miss you. How much I love you.

Because in my eyes your the only one for me. No other guy can ever take your place and when I'm with someone else, it’s not the same cause all i do is think about me and you and how things used to be or if those things will happen to us.

I couldn’t live without you, or should I see, I can live, but it’s not happy. Maybe one day we will realize we're the only ones for each other and live happily ever after like the princess's in the story books do. Thats how I want our story to live.. Happily ever after and if we end up together one day then I'm sure it will be more then happily ever after!

I guess I've said all there is, but I just want you to know that I like you for who you are... but I want you to know that if anything, you could be happier with me. And as much as you want to say, "She doesn't know me, she doesn’t like me for me, We are different." just think of how many times I keep nudging you, disturbing you, calling you, whatever irritating things just to make you notice me, or be close to me. (HEHEHEH!) Those conversations are stored in my heart, when you like someone their words don't just go away..I wish you would understand that. One more thing. “Don’t try to understand Ladies, you will only failed”:D

She miss you... $0fi


To share..
“The scariest thing about distance is that you don’t know whether they’ll miss you or forget you.”
Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook 

“Sometimes the things that are felt the most are expressed between two souls over the distance and over time...where no words abide. And others may speak freely, live with one another freely, express themselves freely– just like everyone else, but then there is you... you have no words for proof of reassurance, no tokens of professed love, but you have something. Something worth keeping.”
C. JoyBell C., Saint Paul Trois Ch Teaux: 1948  


"Love doesn't care  if you two are not together, as long as your hearts are  one"

-yeon♥

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

NEW DOOR :)

New door means something new, new life, new friends, new opportunity, a new people in my life that brought me happiness and excitement.

This one already late to publish, It was only last week since I got back my connection in our house. So When I created this, I only use my mobile phone and edit it in my desktop.

The very first one is the guy i knew this 3 months ago..
I met him in game, he  is very nice guy, kind and very good to me. But he is some kind of a pervert  like my other guild mates.=.=" But in a way of joke only. I don't know  what or how  happen that I fell in love with him.. =.=" Lets say "it's just happen" Anyway.. He is not from PHL.. He is from MY. At first, he don't know how our relationship will go. :( But I said, as long you love each other, nothing to worry. He is a very shy guy. Wondering if he really  likes me. (hehehe)

When he message me, i response fast. it was my first time messaging  people to other country using SMS. Ermmm.. because its  kinda expensive. 15 php every SMS (1page) if call, 1 minute will go like 25 php. Since i like to hear  his voice, sometimes i call him. He also calls me, if i didn't reply him.. Or if he feels I'm mad. That's before though.

He is a gamer and  he so love the game. Same as me. Sometimes i feel jealous when someone  got stronger than me.. that i didn't know. I went to that game as new or should i say, i only transfer to that server. But im glad i can adapt there. I'm the same  level with them alr.. See.. :D
.
Second.is the new.friends I've met in RL...
REAL LIFE.
I've met new friends from my  old friend Rj. (sorry ha, old friend :P)
They are cool, funny and very friendly. So.. I never get bored with them. Same as them, they can't  party party w/o me. Actually, After 3 weeks  i think, they decide we go out of town at Batangas, (if u wanna see pics just take a look at my  FB account) Their name is Danica, Kobe, Neil, Kaye, etc..

When i met them.. They make me always go home late. But they pick me up and send me home. Actually, I want to commute (ride a public transportation) if I'm with them. 'Coz I'm a lazy person. Dun wan walk walk walk. (hahaha) Oh! That time i met them when we  got flood in our village. We stay at my godmother's house. Hehe. So poor, we need to transfer house temporary.. we wait until the water gone in our  street. T.T

What I hate when we transfer is all the things we do in that house is very limited.. I have to go home before 9 pm because the housemaid oblige to lock the gate and the kitchen door that connects to the second house by 10 pm. I'm working and my schedule is very flexible. So they have to endure it for awhile. Sometimes I don't go to work because of that and very hard to live far away with tight security which causing laziness and tardiness. Also, I can't go gala (hanging out) with my friends sometimes because of that reason too.. The network signal there is very slow. diam lah.. phone and even internet. Lols and last,I'm a gamer but  I can't use the PC at there for a long time cos some of my  little brother also play.. x_x The only thing I like is got many foods there and we always do baking with my ninang in her kitchen. I also teach her how to cook other gourmet foods or my specialties.

Third is..
The another opportunity i have to grab... And wait... And to work for..
Im applying in our company as Store Supervisor. Since  I got my  "kinakapatid" sister working at there, She want give me  higher  position... Cos  I am 4 years graduate. She don't want me stuck on the work that anybody can get. Because of that also I wanna make money alr, i want to save some of my salary for the next year.

Anyway about my application, my sister said, I need to resign in my current work. So that i can apply. I said, i will finish first the last remaining 3 months contract  before i apply. And take note, i only apply for MT.. I wonder why in the file, i applied SS. Hehe that's because  I didn't put  the  job position I want..so HR make it as SS. >.<

GOOD LUCK!
Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.9